Trama in MRI

So today marks the most traumatic step in this process thus far. I realize this is silly but the MRI just about did me in today!

I am not sure how many of you have ever had an MRI but basically they stuff you in a 6 foot tube and leave you there for about 30 to 40 minutes. So first they tell me all about what they are going to do, from the IV to the noises and then they strapped me in a girdle so tight that it hurts to breathe. From that point they load me on the moving bed of death! Seriously, this thing is torture! So, at first they had my head in this little contraption that made me feel like I was suffocating. As soon as they slid the chubby girl into the small tube that compressed all major organs, I begged them to remove the Darth Vader mask. Once I had air blowing on my face I felt better and thought, sure I can make it through a few minutes in here. Uh, what was I thinking! Every torturous second I spent in there praying for God to help me breathe and stay clam. I made it till the last 3 minutes before tears started pouring down my face and I squeezed the call button. Cindy was very sweet and told me it was just 3 minutes more. I don' think I breathed for 3 minutes! As soon as the machine stopped making the hideous nosies, I heard the ladies burst in the room and started unplugging me from the oxygen and IV. As soon as they pulled me out I burst into sobs but they were there with cold wet towels, water, a back rub and soft words of comfort. They promised that I could cry and they were going to be through this entire journey with me to listen and support me. I felt ridiculous for losing it like that but I could not have had better support to walk me through it.

Again, how can I ask, "why me?" when my Father has surrounded me with some of the sweetest people to walk me through this. God has set me up with one of the best surgeons in the nation at one of the leading hospitals in the area of breast cancer. God has literally given me some of the best and how can I be anything but grateful.

While laying stuffed in that tube of death, my mind kept replaying parts of one of my favorite Psalms. It is passage 91 and it goes something like this... He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust... If you make the Most High your dwelling, even the Lord, who is my refuge- then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent... "Because he loves me," says the Lord, I will rescue him; I will protect him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. (Best part!) With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation."

What a promise to live in right now! A more content woman you could not find right now because I am there, resting in His shadow.